


Ignoring the truth (somehow it still finds you)

by novera_nope



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Drama & Romance, M/M, POV Outsider, POV Third Person, POV Third Person Limited, Romance, Sif watches, kids to adults
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:22:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22830124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/novera_nope/pseuds/novera_nope
Summary: Sif falls back against the wall as every touch, every glance she’s ever witnessed between Thor and Loki, flashes before her eyes, fraught with new meaning.
Relationships: Loki/Thor (Marvel)
Comments: 52
Kudos: 239





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> 4 short chapters, posted daily. Kid Loki & Thor to post-Ragnarok. Rated M for later chapters. Hope you enjoy!

_Thor: 13_  
_Loki: 9_

They're out in the field behind the palace gardens that afternoon. Not Volstagg, who's fallen ill with some bug that's been making its way through the palace, but the others are there: Fandral and Hogun, Thor and Sif. And Loki, of course, for he _always_ goes wherever Thor does. 

Once, Sif and the Warriors dared complain about it – surely, Thor must realize that Loki's quite a shit at times, no? Thor saw red, unleashing a number of obscenities on them and making sure they knew they would never see him again if they didn't welcome his little brother. That, and he ignored them for the next three weeks. None of them ever made that mistake again. 

Sif sighs. She's not in the mood for sparring, like the two Warriors are currently doing, so she jumps up and announces she's going for a walk in the woods nearby. Thor, restless without any physical activity on the field, joins her. 

It's a lovely day really, a gentle breeze rustling the tree leaves, occasionally letting the sunshine through. 

“Where's your brother?” Sif asks, suddenly realizing she hasn't seen Loki for at least half an hour. 

Thor smiles fondly. “Said he wanted to climb some trees or something.”

Sif imagines Loki high up in a tree, probably tormenting some poor squirrel, before she realizes this means she's actually alone with Thor. Truly alone, for once. _Now or never_. 

She musters up all the courage she has. “Thor? Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.” Thor's still walking steadily by her side, unaware of how her heart starts hammering. 

She swallows. “Have you – have you ever kissed anyone?” 

“Hm.” Thor shrugs. “No.”

“Neither have I,” Sif offers. “But I heard it's good.”

Silence stretches between them up tot he point where Sif starts to wonder if Thor's ever going to catch on. Which he doesn’t, apparently, for he just keeps walking, humming this little tune she’s heard Loki sing the other day. 

But Sif’s nothing if not brave, and she’s not giving up that easily. “You wanna… try, maybe?”

This finally gets Thor’s attention. He comes to an abrupt halt and turns towards her. “You... want me to kiss you?” he asks, brows quirked in surprise. 

“Yes,” she nods, smiling with more confidence than she feels. “I'd like that.”

“Em... okay,” he says slowly. “Okay. If that's what you want.” He’s looking at her intently while his hand comes up, pointing her chin slightly upwards. Then he lowers his face towards hers, and _Norns_ , he's looking at her lips, and she instinctively reaches up towards him, and – 

A shriek pierces the air, followed by a loud thump nearby. Thor jumps up in alarm. " _Loki_ ”, he breathes, and then he's running towards the vicinity of the quiet sobs that follow. 

Loki. Of course it's blasted _Loki_. At that moment, Sif hates him with every fiber of her being, but she still goes after Thor. 

Loki's a pitiful heap beneath a nearby tree. He's clutching his ankle, trying not to cry and failing miserably, and Thor's fussing over him, prodding every limb to make sure there's no further damage. When he's reassured it's just the ankle and his brother isn't _dying_ or something, he lifts Loki up gently, cradling him in his arms. 

“I'm taking him to a healer,” he says urgently, already on his way to the palace. 

Sif can do nothing but watch them take off. What she's not prepared for, is the look Loki gives her over Thor's shoulder. His green eyes meet hers and what she sees in them, is utter rage.


	2. Two

_Thor: 21_  
_Loki: 17_

“You're _not_ coming dressed like that,” Thor blazes, taking in his brother's attire. 

Sif rolls her eyes. They're about to leave for a party that technically Loki isn't even allowed to attend, and yet he's here, insisting to come along, and making everything difficult as usual. “Thor, we're already late, come on.” 

It takes about half an hour of arguing before they're finally ready to go, Loki still in the ultra skinny black jeans and clingy shirt he'd been wearing before. “Alright!” Thor exclaims, exasperated. “But no alcohol for you, Loki.” 

Sif's eyes meet Hogun's. Is Thor really _that_ naive? 

The party's actually fun, she decides when a few hours later, she's slowly swaying to the music in the arms of an attractive guy. Thor's talking animatedly with some girl at the bar and she hopes it works out – her teenage crush on him is far behind her at this point. 

Even in the dim lights she does notice, however, when Thor's eyes suddenly narrow and become glued to a spot on the dancefloor. She turns around in an awkward gesture and what she sees is... unexpected. 

Loki is dancing with another man – if one could call this dancing. His lean body – even Sif has to admit that Loki's a sight to behold as this age – is all but grinding into the other man's, who's positively _licking_ a path across Loki's neck. Loki's head falls backwards in a silent moan. The guy whispers something in his ear then, to which Loki nods enthusiastically and next thing, they’re on their way to the exit. 

They never make it. Chaos erupts as Thor knocks over several people, clawing his way towards his brother. He tears Loki away from the other man harshly, and shoves him off as he starts bashing the guy, repeatedly. 

She and Hogun arrive just in time before Thor can afflict any real damage. It takes the two of them to restrain him though, and Sif’s not sure how long she can keep this up. “Go!” she yells at the guy. “Get out of here!” 

He looks from her to Thor to Loki, and he backs off. 

When Thor twists himself out of their grip, Sif thinks he’s going to bolt after the guy, but instead he lunges for Loki and throws him over his shoulder like it is nothing. “We’re going home,” he growls loud enough for Sif and Hogun to hear over the beat of the music. 

Sober, Loki might pose a challenge to Thor , but inebriated, he doesn’t stand a chance. All the wailing and kicking and screaming in the world won’t get him out of Thor’s death grip, Sif knows. 

Yet when she briefly catches Loki’s eyes, she’s startled to notice that they’re actually perfectly clear and steady. As he turns away, his lips curve into into a wicked grin and he looks for all the Nine Realms like he’s exactly where he wants to be.


	3. Three

_During Thor (I)_

Things quickly go downhill after that. Sif had always imagined that at some point in his life, Thor would grow tired of his brother’s constant presence, but instead it’s Loki who becomes bitter and jealous in the run-up to Thor’s coronation, putting more and more distance between himself and Thor.

Even after all this time, it surprises Sif just how much Thor’s hurting without Loki by his side. How _lost_ he seems. She’s beginning to realize there’s a depth to their relationship that she’s never even contemplated before it seems gone.

When Thor attacks Jotunheim, rashly – Loki’s doing more than Thor’s, Sif is sure of it – and he is banished in the aftermath, Loki doesn’t even blink an eye. Their relationship seems beyond repair.

And yet, when Sif and the Warriors arrive on Earth and it becomes obvious that there’s _something_ between her comrade and the human girl, she can’t help but wonder how Loki would feel about that, if he knew. If he’d look at Jane the way he did at _her_ , that day in the forest. She's still not decided whether or not she believes he fell out of that tree by accident.

The answer comes with the Destroyer. At first, she has no idea who sent the infernal thing, but as she sees Thor walking straight towards it, unarmed, she knows it must be Loki who’s behind it.

The fact that Thor isn’t immediately blasted away by the contraption, proves her right.

For a moment, Sif thinks the battle’s over, but then the Destroyer _slaps_ Thor in the face, reminding her of a spurned lover. Something clicks inside her head.

 _A spurned lover_.

Could it be? Their stubborn possessiveness towards each other, the ridiculous closeness – so easily mistaken for brotherly affection – had it been something else altogether?

Sif is snapped back to reality when Jane nearly knocks her over on her way to Thor’s body, sprawled out on the ground. She watches as Thor dies, as Mjölnir returns to him, as Thor battles his brother’s device with his newly regained strength. 

By the time he emerges victorious, she’s already forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Loki in the next chapter, I promise!


	4. Four

_Post-Ragnarok_

So much death. So much destruction. 

It’s just her and Thor now, Sif thinks, swallowing a lump in her throat as she remembers her other friends, slain on the battlefield. Well, it’s her and Thor _and Loki_ , for in the end Loki chose to fight by his brother’s side after all. How Thor finds it in him to forgive his brother so easily is beyond her. 

She’s on her way to Thor’s chambers, trying to find her way through the Grandmaster’s ship – it’s so big, and yet way too small for the many homeless Asgardians currently occupying it.

When Sif’s finally able to locate Thor’s chambers, her knock goes unanswered. She swears, but then she hears indistinct sounds coming from inside and she enters anyway. She finds the living room empty – the sounds are coming from the bedroom. 

“Never doubt that I love you,” she hears when she’s close enough to make out the words. And then, raggedly: “I’ve always loved you, brother.” 

_Loki_. Of course it's Loki. 

These words are not meant for her ears, Sif’s well aware of that. She should leave, she _knows_ , but something compels her to keep going, one foot before the other. She almost trips over a discarded bottle stopper on the way, but somehow she manages to maintain her balance and reach the bedroom door that’s slightly ajar. She hesitates, just for a moment, but then she peaks her head around the doorway. 

Thor’s sitting in the middle of the bed, his broad back turned towards her, red cape pooling at his hips. He’s naked. On top of him is Loki, long legs draped around Thor’s waist, gripping his shoulders for leverage as he gently moves up and down. 

Sif's transfixed as she stares at him. She knows it’s Loki – she can _see_ it’s him – and yet he doesn’t resemble the Loki she knows, not in the slightest. He looks content, almost serene – gone is the usual restlessness, the viciousness. He’s beautiful like this. 

She must have made a sound at that point, for suddenly Loki’s eyes fly open and fall on hers. 

Her mouth opens and closes again. She expects to be thrown out violently, yelled at, _something_ – but Loki doesn’t even flinch. There’s no embarrassment in his eyes, no unease even. There's no need for that, as they both know he belongs there. 

He does still his movements, though, eliciting a needy sound from Thor that Sif hadn’t thought him capable of. It makes something inside her _twitch_. 

“Loki,” Thor groans, leaning over and shoving his brother down on the bed, rolling on top of him. “Stop teasing.” He pushes into him feverishly as he starts to lean in for a kiss, and - 

Loki’s hand flicks casually towards the door and it slams shut in her face.

_Oh_. Sif breathes in and out a couple of times, trying to calm her raging heart, and then she flees. 

When she’s far enough away from Thor’s room, she falls back against the wall as every touch, every glance she’s ever witnessed between Thor and Loki, flashes before her eyes, fraught with new meaning. 

This doesn’t come as a shock to her, not really. It’s always been there, dangling right in front of her, but up until now, she has always chosen to ignore the truth. That’s, well, not an option any more – Sif closes her eyes as the image of Thor and Loki _together_ keeps playing in her mind. _Norns_. 

She’s happy for Thor. She’ll never understand why it had to be Loki of all people, but she’s glad that in the middle of all this chaos, her friend – her King – at least has this. She’ll never tell a soul though, she knows - their secret is hers to keep now, too. 

She also knows she’ll have to be on her guard around the clock from now on. Loki’s undoubtedly going to make her _pay_ for that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all folks! I hope you enjoyed the story.

**Author's Note:**

> (Title is from the song by Bear Hands)


End file.
